MINDSET RESET: From romanticizing struggle to accepting ease

A man meets a woman. They really like each other. They spend time getting to know each other, go on dates and vacations, and eventually fall in love. They introduce each other to their respective families; the families are very happy. The elders from both families meet, and everything goes well. Soon, with everyone’s blessings, the two lovebirds get married. They have a good life together, they have children, raise a healthy, happy family. And they live happily ever after.

How did reading that make you feel? Did it feel like the story was boring? Or was there a part of you that believed it is impossible for everything to go that smoothly? If there were challenges or struggles in that story, would you feel better about it?

The Drama

If you found it boring, that might be an indication that the mind is subconsciously looking for drama. Let’s be honest. Sometimes, we all like a little drama in our own lives. It might seem fun, even. Life would seem a little dull without it, right? However, if we continuously feed this subconscious need, we may run the risk of eventually attracting a lot more drama than we can handle, likely, at an especially inconvenient time. Would letting go of our addiction to drama not help us have more time and energy for everything else that we need to do, in the long run?

Don’t get stuck in the mud.” – GMCKS,

Experiencing Being, The Golden Lotus Sutras on Life

Conditioning

If you found yourself unable to believe that something like that can happen – that something good cannot manifest without any hindrance – it may be a good idea to figure out why you have this belief. Why does your mind not allow you to believe that some things can be achieved without struggle?

Challenges are a part of life, true, but romanticizing struggles might be equal to admiring the mud we’re stuck in. Our time is probably better spent focusing on (read: feeding our energy to) our goals.

“Only when we work hard for something, do we appreciate it’s true value!”

Growing up, a lot of us may have heard our elders repeat this several times. It is like saying, only if we, by ourselves, grow a mango tree, will we know the value of a mango or truly savour it. Sure, it could give us a sense of accomplishment, and we might enjoy it more because of the added emotional value. But a mango grown by someone else also has equal value. We only need a grateful heart, to be conscious of all the effort that has gone into producing and delivering that mango to our hands, for us to value it and savour it. The whole point is to develop a grateful heart and be more conscientious – and to get to this point, one must question, is working hard, spending many years, to grow a mango the only way? We can learn to be grateful, practice being more aware, and be more sensitive without the struggle.

“You have to ‘earn’ it!”

Some of us may, consciously or subconsciously, believe that something good can come to us only after a period of struggle. Or, that we are not entitled to have something good if we haven’t ‘earned’ it by overcoming something difficult. This mindset will make it difficult for good things to come to us easily, even if we have the entitlement. If we are subconsciously unwilling to accept goodness, in whatever form – love, healthy relationships, success, prosperity, or miracles – without first overcoming obstacles, aren’t we shutting the door in the face of good fortune? It is equivalent to asking for trouble before receiving good things. As the saying goes, ‘ask and you shall receive’. And thus, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

“Life is like an echo!” – GMCKS,

Achieve the Impossible, The Golden Lotus Sutra on Spiritual Business Management

“Whatever comes easily will not stay”

It is also worth mentioning, that some of us might also have the belief that whatever comes easily will not stay – stating that as a reason to legitimize allowing struggle to be a part of our life. Let’s take the example of people who win lotteries. A study by National Endowment for Financial Education (NEFE), USA states that around 70% of the people who win lotteries or a large windfall end up broke after just a few years. Some of the common mistakes lottery winners make are: overestimating the amount they will actually receive, not hiring or listening to financial advisors, unchecked spending, unwise investments, living an extravagant lifestyle and so on.

It is not the fault of the money. The problem isn’t the way that money came to them. The problem lies with the person who received the money – they did not manage it properly.

The tendency of most people is to avoid taking responsibility for the bad decisions they made, and hence, we have a long-perpetuated belief that anything that comes easily will not stay, while the truth of the matter might just be that, they were not well-equipped to handle the good fortune that came their way.

Struggle is neither the solution nor is it important.

All beliefs that we have that glorify struggle and prevent us from being relaxed, are holding us back. It is essential to recognize and challenge the pervasive mindset that romanticizes struggle as a prerequisite for success or happiness. Not every narrative needs to be riddled with challenges to be meaningful or fulfilling. The craving for drama might be deeply ingrained, but it’s worth questioning whether this subconscious need for struggle is ultimately serving our well-being.

Life is undoubtedly filled with challenges, but embracing the belief that every achievement requires an arduous journey may hinder our ability to appreciate and attract positivity effortlessly. The notion that we must “earn” our blessings through struggle can create unnecessary barriers, shutting us off from the abundance that life has to offer. The easiness of the attainment is not connected to our ability to manage and appreciate the good fortune that comes our way. Blaming the ease of acquisition is a way of avoiding responsibility for managing success effectively. It is time to challenge these limiting beliefs and understand that struggle is not the only path to growth, success, or happiness. By letting go of the glorification of struggle, we free up valuable energy and time to focus on our goals, relationships, and personal development. Embracing a mindset that allows for ease, gratitude, and conscious living can lead to a more fulfilling and enriching life.

“The Light is always there. How much light comes to you depends on you.” – GMCKS,

Compassionate Objectivity, The Golden Lotus Sutras on Character Building

When we make the effort to observe, we can find evidence of how, even in the littlest things, struggle is usually unhelpful. For example, while walking or running – the calmer you are, the further you can go. Another example – while swimming, the more you struggle, the quicker you run out of air. Amidst a crisis, usually, the person who comes up with a solution is the one who is not giving into struggle, and is keeping their calm.

For any Potterhead, one fun way to remember that struggle is not helpful is by remembering what happened with the Devil’s Snare plant. For those who are familiar with the Chinese Finger Trap toy, we know, struggling really hard to pull our fingers apart will only cause it to grip on even tighter. Struggling is usually not a positive sign; it often causes the problem to worsen.

The universe is abundant. If we are able to let go of our limitations to align with it, everything we need will flow to us in abundance. Struggle, very often, disrupts the flow of whatever is meant to come to us.

“Do not make the mistake of thinking that your limitations are the limitations of the guru or of god.” – GMCKS,

Achieve the Impossible, The Golden Lotus Sutra on Spiritual Business Management

For arhatic yoga practitioners

Thanks to the genius of the Guru, removing struggle is already a part of the agenda and a by-product of the practice. With pillar 1 increasing our conductivity, pillar 2 helping us break old, unproductive thoughts and thought patterns, pillar 3 supplying us with enormous energy to move forward in the right direction, pillar 4 ensuring that we generate good karma to make our lives easier, and pillar 5 equipping us with knowledge, we can assess and reassess our plans and execution strategies as we go, and be able to constantly seek out the areas of our life where there is struggle, and replace it with ease. We have all the support we need, continuous energy supply and a full tool box, we only need to figure out where the problem is, which tool to use and fix it.